I Really Do(n’t) Care

Weird, I know. Its a defense mechanism I adapted at the beginning of the year that kicks in when I’m hurt, angry, frustrated, exhausted, hungry…lol. Seriously. Its the IDC syndrome. And the D stands for Do and Don’t.

Emotions are exhausting and I guess purging. And I’ve had my share of them in the first few days of the first month of the New Year. I made a silent pact with myself that I would not give any additional emotional energy to ANYthing. Not work, not relationships, not…much. Work, action, why of course, but true and deep emotion, nah. Its taxing, its draining, its borderline depressing.

And then there are moments when I reflect on all the situations, things, people that I Do(n’t) care to invest energy in and realize its not healthy, its not logical, its not even real. I’m in fact choosing not to go all the way there because I think 1-2 people may be reading this blog wondering what the HAY I’m talking about and I do not, no, I choose not to use the energy to explain.

So. Phil 4:8. I choose rather to focus on things that are good, pure, praise-worthy. Hoping the other stuff works itself out because I don’t feel like dealing, don’t even know how, don’t really want to figure it out because I have … other things to do. Things that are a wee bit more enjoyable, a tad bit easier, and more comfortable than going there.

I do(n’t) know.

Be the Change

What a cliche’? Well, its come to be…however its truth is overlooked. Social media and even idle conversation leads many to complain point fingers and blame (I’m not using great punctuation, I know) and repeat cycle. I really choose to be a part of the solution. Negative self-image, self-worth, and self-esteem. We clearly do not see one another or OURSELVES as God sees us. And what can I do? I can:

1. Remind myself everyday that Man (and Woman) was created in God’s image. Insert huge smile.
2. Know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made…intentionally and with purpose. My hopes dreams desires and strengths are fully and completely a reflection of who MY God created me to be and WHAT MY God created me to do. I am Powerful because the All-Powerful God is my Daddy, My King, My Lord, and He has made me an heir…its my birth-right. Definitely not earned with merit- purchased with blood.
3. Embrace the fact that God made EVERYONE else around me with His love and the same measure of grace and mercy He extends to me. Something about being Black, Young, Woman, Christian, Educated,…blah blah…makes me no less no more, makes me human. Connects me to you, to my community, to my neighbors, my coworkers, my student, my parents, my world.
4. Build relationships at every opportunity I get. Talk to people, get to know them, listen and care. Pray for and be open to the chance to hear and help. See and do. Ask and answer with my hands.

Ahhhhhhh!!!! Its so easy to look at problems, but what a solution to BE a kind word, a warm smile, a genuine embrace, a helping hand, a leader, a teacher, a mentor, a friend…Anyway, thats who I’ve been created to BE.

-The Change