Love yourself

Name 3 things you love about yourself.

That sounds taboo, right? So often we are focused on the things that we can fix or improve. Let’s take a moment and acknowledge self love. I love myself. Flaws and all- that is where my confidence comes from. If nothing else I have to choose to love me. I mean, I want others to love me. Why would I request or require of them something I fail to give myself? It doesn’t make sense.

So, self love and self care is real. We had a morning meeting and my student asked, “love yourself more than your mom?”. I replied, “well, if you don’t love yourself first it is very hard to love someone else”. We talked about it. I shared that for me, God, self, others is the order of my love.

Receiving and feeling loved by God first then reciprocating that love on me and passing it to those around me has proven difficult and yet so simple. I love because I am loved. You’d be surprised how many kids chose not to share a compliment about themselves to the group. My students are not shy, they are intelligent speakers, and I was really taken a back by the fact that only 50% of them shared what they “love about” themselves. We are going to work on this.

I told them to never lose the ability to encourage and build themselves up- it is a magic power. It is healing and warm. It is necessary and yet stolen so young. We teach children that recognizing their strengths is bragging. No it isn’t. I am a good teacher. That is true. I’m not putting anyone else down. It doesn’t mean I don’t have room to grow. I simply am a good teacher, right now, in this moment. As my students are in PE, I am filling my cup and preparing for the day ahead. I practice what I preach. I tell them to read and write daily and I do. I teach them to be confident and kind- and I am. I want them to solve problems and change the world and that is what I do…one lecture at a time, one lesson at a time, one book at a time, one blog post at a time!

I love myself.

Love yourself.

IMG_2561

Advertisements

I love a guy.

You know the saying about love?

Our first love is young. 

Our second love is hard. 

Our third love we don’t see coming. 

I guess I’m in between love one and two. But I still love a guy. What’s funny is, I’m 99.8% sure that we won’t be together and we may not remain friends. And it has taken a year to come to terms with that, but I think I’m finding comfort in knowing that that is probably healthy and best.

I still write about him. I still think about him. And most days, I’m not sure if I am in love with him. Or I simply possess a deep love FOR him. Our ability to differentiate the two is imperative. Love is unconditional. It keeps no record of wrong. It is humble and selfless and to quite honest it is uncomfortable and unnatural. Most people give conditional though. Though the conditions may be broad, when pushed to the limit, a limit is found.

This idea of unconditional love bothers me. Let me rephrase, its agitates my normal behavior. You make me sad, I love you less. You disrespect me, you get boundaries of my love. I know, there seems to be nothing wrong with that, but if love isn’t free…is it love? Whats the price of love? A ring? A wedding? A child? Can it ever be paid for?

I love a man. And he may not even love me back. And that makes me even more confident about my love for him. He’s made me sad. He’s offended me. Never disrespect, never intentional harm, never unapologetic. And I love him.

Some days I feel like proclaiming this love, because it is evidence that divorce and heartbreak, and failed relationships did not crush me. They didn’t steal my capacity to love and to give without expectation. And that is a miracle. That’s evidence of the God I serve. One who can heal and transform and restore.

Back to love. Family. I love them unconditionally. Friends…my friends. I love them unconditionally and even the healthy boundaries I establish for them are not barriers to my love.

My students. I love them unconditionally. And they need that love. They need to feel and see that love. They need to know that that love is…real love. So as they grow and experience life, they can be prepared to give and receive the love that covers all.

I still love a guy.