I feel like writing

Its funny that I don’t have anything specific in mind. I’m just going to begin typing and see what comes out.

Dance. I joined a contemporary class and its challenging. If I walk into class with heaviness in my heart it shows up in my movements and in my patience with my progress. Last class I was pissed. The instructor was moving too fast and I didn’t remember much as I was expected to run through with a group of two- the other two in my line.

I was irritated. I didn’t remember. I needed more time. I wasn’t ready and I hadn’t mastered these moves, so why on Earth would I want to “run through it with my line”? I struggled through after two suggestions to “feel the movement” and do what I could remember. Still sounds absurd, but I’m trying to apply that to life.

 

  1. Feel- be in the moment.
  2. Cast off the concern of perfection.

Story.

Of.

My.

Life.

 

One day I’ll get there. I’ll dance like no one is watching. Like the steps are mine to create. Like each movement is perfect without rehearsal. And until then…I’ll check the mirror but look at it less. More feeling, less thinking. More in the moment, less planning. More living, less analyzing my life.

Starting now.

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Just say No

I love that word. To say it. To hear it (usually).

I don’t know why more people won’t just tell me no. Like instead of having things lingering and having me wait (I told y’all I struggle with patience). Say no, so I can move on.

 

No, I don’t like you.

No, I don’t EVER want to date you.

No, I won’t be there.

No, I can’t do that.

No, I don’t like this.

For Pete’s sake…whoever Pete is- say “NO”. And mean it. Close the door of confusion, and of indecision, and of back and forth minds, and blurry lines.

In the words of my old D.A.R.E. instruction, JUST SAY NO.